Framing and Reframing

Framing, in communication, is essentially the act of intentionally setting the stage for the conversation. Framing a conversation involves expressing why you want to engage in a topic, sharing your intent, and your hope to resolve the conflict.  When you frame a conversation, everyone in the conversation is aware of the speaker’s intent and motivation.

There are many ways to frame conversations, here are a few ideas of how to frame a conversation effectively.

Ask if This is a Good Time to Talk

“I have been wanting to connect with you to discuss______.  Would now be a good time?”  (If the answer is no, take a minute to schedule a  time)

Consider Sharing your Concerns, and Intentions

• “This is important to me because…..”
• “I’m only bringing this up because I want this project to be successful and I’m worried that we are missing something.”
• “My intention is to share my thoughts with you, but I don’t have any expectations.”
• “I care about our relationships and I want to make sure we are addressing challenges as they come up.”
• “I’m pretty stressed about this issue because…”
• “I have been thinking about this a lot and so I thought it was time to ask for help.”

Assertive Framing – Framing a Boundary

• “I know this is important to you but I’m just too busy to go to that concert right now. “
• “I can see this isn’t a good time to talk, so I’d like to set up a time that works better.”
• “I’m sorry, but I already have too much on my plate.”
• “I appreciate you thinking of me for this project. I’m currently working on X, which means I’m too busy to complete both projects. I have to say no to your request.”

Framing sets the stage for the rest of the conversation to unfold.  A little bit of framing goes a long way to help the conversation be productive and to manage some of the conflicts that can occur when people make assumptions about their conversation or conflict.

REFRAMING

Framing happens at the beginning of a conversation, Reframing happens when things get off track and you need to bring a conversation back on topic. Reframing a conversation helps us determine what is actually happening, which in turn helps us focus on the larger picture or our end goals, and will help defuse a tense situation.  Reframing can be used for many things when managing conflict.

• Defusing inflammatory language
• Recasting negatives into neutral or positive statements
• Refocusing attention
• Acknowledging strong emotions in a productive manner
• Translating communication so that it is more likely to be heard and acknowledged by other parties
• Contextualizing the dispute, providing a broader perspective